Can love help you in leadership

If you are looking to improve your leadership you might have to look beyond the office.  Science suggests that one of the things that can help us be empathetic and sincere in the work environment is the quality of our personal relationships outside of work.  By being in a relationship that allows us to be both vulnerable and strong at home, we encourage the brain to develop in a way that increases our self-confidence.  In bringing an increased sense of self-confidence to your professional platform, you can learn to truly thrive as a leader. 

The security we gain in our personal relationships bring security and confidence in our professional encounters.  Please do not confuse self-confidence with arrogance.  They are not at all the same thing.  The traits of a secure leader include; open-mindedness, emotional control and empathy.  These qualities can enhance our ability to lead others through relationship building with our team members.  These concepts put to work in the professional environment can also help the person to create an environment based in mutual trust and respect. When the ego isn't threatened, it is amazing how working relationships can thrive.

We need to train our ego somewhere.  The chances of this happening at work are far less than this occurring in a loving relationship at home. By creating an environment in a personal relationship with your partner includes open and honest communication, many things happen. You begin to take yourself less seriously.  You understand is it OK for someone else to have a better idea than yours and you learn to give of yourself without expecting credit or accolades in return.  This is where the leadership growth occurs.

While many people will discuss the concept of 'not bringing work home with you', oftentimes the sentiment behind this sage advise is misunderstood.  Do not bring any emotional upset home with you; of course, we can all see how that would be problematic.  But by discussing work matters with your significant other after the fact, you are allowing yourself to process the situation with a non-biased trust partner. The result of this practice can be very powerful.

Your partner probably has permission to hold you accountable for your actions. They also probably know your character and the core values you find important.  In the safe environment of the home, work matters can be discussed in a way that reveal details about your actions, affect or motivation you might have missed in the hustle and bustle of the work day.  This may shed light on delicate matters and help you see if you handled the situation appropriately or if you overreacted due to the stress occurring in your work environment.

Please make no mistake; you should not share any personal or inappropriate details with your spouse, there are some professional matters where privacy needs to be respected. This is not about gossip.  This is about honestly discussing what you encountered in your professional day and taking responsibility for how you handled the situation.  There is usually a way of discussing concepts without too much detail or compromising sensitive information.  This allows you to process your professional actions with the love, support and perspective of the person you selected as your partner.  In this important role, your partner has a vested interest in you being the best version of yourself.  There are very few people in the world we can honestly say that about.

Maybe it is time you invited your significant other to see the inter-workings of your professional personality.  Once you learn to harness the power of self-reflection with the perspective of your spouse; you may start seeing things differently. Give it a try; I am confident your staff with thank you for it.